A bride revealed on Reddit that that her mother talked her into having a small ceremony despite her plans to get married at the courthouse, but noted that she only did it that way because her mother felt so passionately about her having a more formal affair and because she agreed to make all the arrangementsAfter several months of sharing ideas with her mother on Pinterest and suggestions for color schemes, she discovered that the only thing her mom had planned was for her daughter to ride into the ceremony on a horseWhen the bride canceled the ceremony due to a lack of planning, she claimed her mom then accused her of “slandering” her on Facebook and called her a “disappointment” in a family group chat
A bride’s wedding ceremony has been scrapped after her mom dropped the ball on planning.
In a post on Reddit’s popular “Am I the A******?” forum, a 27-year-old woman shared that her mother talked her into having a small ceremony despite her plans to get married at the courthouse. The bride, who shared that she deals with anxiety, said she only agreed to the switch because her mother felt so passionately about her having a more formal affair and because she agreed to make all the arrangements.
According to the bride, the trouble began a year ago when she and her fiancé shared a message with their family and friends announcing their engagement and plans to tie the knot at the courthouse. At the time, her mom asked why the couple didn’t have a small ceremony instead, to which the woman replied, “I don’t want to because trying to plan anything makes my anxiety go into overload.”
Her mom said, “Well then let me plan it.” The bride agreed and let her mother take the reins on planning — or so she thought. After several months of sharing ideas with her mother on Pinterest and suggestions for color schemes, she discovered that the only thing her mom had planned was for her daughter to ride into the ceremony on a horse.
“Fast forward, it’s two months before the wedding is supposed to happen, and my stepdad pulls me aside and says, ‘if you want this wedding to happen, you need to start pitching in and helping your mom,’ ” the bride wrote.
Woman wedding dress shopping (stock image).
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She then noted that she had “made the guest list, picked out the color theme, sorted the wedding party, pretty much all the important things on my end so I haven’t just been completely hands off.” She even found the horse after her mom messaged her, “What if you rode in on a horse?”
With the ceremony just two months away, the overwhelmed bride decided to cancel the whole thing rather than scramble to finish all of the planning. She then posted a message on an event group on Facebook announcing that “due to personal circumstances we are no longer having a wedding ceremony, but will still be having a late reception for anyone who had already made travel plans.”
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However, her mom took the message and the cancellation as a personal slight. The bride claimed her mom accused her of “slandering” her on Facebook and called her daughter a “disappointment” in a family group chat. “I want to know if I’m justified in being upset and telling everyone we were going back to our original courthouse plan?” she asked on Reddit.
Responses to the bride were mixed with many agreeing that her mom should have been more transparent about her lack of progress, while also noting that the mother and daughter appear to have communication issues they need to work through moving forward.
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“Overall sounds like you two have some communication issues that go beyond this situation,” one person commented. “Whether it’s mostly her, mostly you, or some or both I don’t know but that is what I’d focus on if you want to have a better relationship.”
Another added, “She pressured you into making a choice you didn’t want by assuring you she’d take care of everything, or at least of what stressed you out, and then she did nothing?? She never wanted to help, she just wanted you to have a wedding for her satisfaction. I’m not even gonna comment on the Facebook group because that’s INSANE. I’m sorry and I know it’s your mom, but honestly she should be ashamed of herself.”
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